Wednesday, December 31, 2008

2K9

Happy 2009, folks! I suppose this is the primier post of the year on honeygarlic.blogspot.com, so without further delay:

F1RST!

Now that that's out of the way, here are my 2008 resolutions:

  • Every day, I will go out of my way to do at least one thing that makes me physically stronger.
  • Every day, I will learn something that makes me mentally and morally stronger.
  • Every week, I will have something creative constructed to show for my efforts throughout that week.
  • Every month, I will eat something I believe to be allergic to - just to see if I really am or not.

  • Not bad. I blew the first two in September, having moved back to Brantford and lost the will to excercize. As for the third, it was arguably lost around May/June. Not for any particular reason... I just lost the habit.

    My final resolution was to eat something I believe to be allergic to. (Wow... that's bad grammar.) I did this once a month, every month, until now. (As I type this, I have four hours to eat a shrimp to keep at least that one resolution from last year. I found sushi! Got it covered! Uh oh, my throat's closing...)

    Here are my resolutions for this year:
    1. Re-try my third resolution from last year: Every week, I will have something creative constructed to show for my effots throughout that week. To maintain this, I'll keep a weekly record to be posted on my other blog, here.
    2. Up my GPA by two points for next term. (This shouldn't be too hard. For our non-Laurier readers, our school works on a twelve point system.)
    3. Be healthier in these respects:
      • Eat less grease. (i.e. Switch to margerine instead of butter and limit my use of the deep frier.
      • Make a five minute effort towards physically demanding excersize each day.
      • Floss daily.
    That's it for me. You may recal, Ryan's resolutions were 1280x768. I have reason to believe he's kept them. I'm sure our beloved readers can expect a post shortly from him.

    --
    D. Phillips

    Saturday, December 27, 2008

    Best Scanning Software Ever!

    I just got a laser printer at the boxing day sales!  

    It's a Samsung: a company which until now I've never really cared for since I can't crack my cellular.With it came a piece of software called SmarThru 4. And with that piece of software came a feature. A feature for which I am now a fan of the Samsung brand.

    It's a bit of scanning software that recognizes characters, so I can copy text straight from my scans. I had a piece of software like this when I lived in residence, but SmarThru 4 features a few points that my old one didn't:

    1. Recognizes and keeps formatting.
    2. Recognizes images, and keeps those images in the document.
    3. Recognizes columns and groups paragraphs neatly (although each line ends in a paragraph break, that's still pretty damn good).
    4. Saving in a variety of formats, including rich text (with or without paragraph breaks), MS Word (with or without images), and Adobe PDF (with or without images).
    5. In the setup for the OCR feature (optical character recognition), it asks to select your language. Maybe this is for a more accurate character database (so people in America don't get Russian characters), or maybe it runs what it scans through a spellcheck to assure the most accurate text possible. I don't know.


    So, all my hype and excitement leads to this:

    I haven't been able to find this software on any download sites (legit or otherwise), but hopefully it'll show up somewhere. (Maybe if you try downloading the software for my printer, it'll be included?)

    --

    D. Phillips

    Thursday, December 25, 2008

    Merry Christmas pt. 2

    I originally intended to pass along holiday greetings from the cast of Scrubs, but somebody who shall remain nameless beat me to the punch.

    So instead, merry Christmas to one and all - from the unlikely duo of Bing Crosby and David Bowie!



    --Ryan

    Wednesday, December 24, 2008

    Merry Christmas!

    By the time anyone gets to reading this, you probably won't care... But perhaps someone will read this in a year and enjoy the screenshots of Google's and NORAD's satellites following the big man across the world. Perhaps.

    Here he is, as viewed through the Google Earth application (with an extension from noradsanta.org):


    Man, what a great guy. He was just in the Toronto area about ten minutes ago, so I snuffed out the fireplace in preparation for him.

    If you don't want to download Google Earth, NORAD had some maps on their site as well:


    Seems like the Barenaked Ladies were wrong; Africa seems to have done well this year.
    But what's this?!? Oh my gosh!

    He practically skipped right over Russia and Mongolia! Those poor people of northern Asia! How could this be?

    Let's investigate:


    Zooming in between the default points in Google Earth, we can see right inside of Santa's sack... and it appears... Omigosh! It's empty.

    Santa's sack is empty.

    Well, let's face it... If he ran out of gifts and had to pick between Russia and Africa, the African's are probably more needy.

    --
    D. Phillips


    UPDATE:
    So, Santa was just here. He just popped in to say "hi", since his sack was empty by this point...

    And he said he did do it for the Barenaked Ladies. I probably shouldn't say this, but I guess he felt that he owed a favor to Steven Page... For taking the fall while Santa was into the snow.

    Tuesday, December 23, 2008

    Well it *was* there

    I know the previous post says I'll have something up no later than Monday. And this, the next post, is going up Tuesday.

    On the surface, that would seem to be a bald-faced lie on my part.

    However, there was a post there - and at least the person who commented on it overnight can back me up on that.

    Here's what it was: using the free audio-editing program Audacity, I changed the pitches of various popular songs. Then I uploaded the best ones and linked to them.

    One of the tags for that post was 'borderline copyright infringement' - meant as a joke more than anything. Yet I suspect that's what tipped somebody off, and Blogger removed my post in accordance with the Digital Millenium Copyright Act.

    I don't believe that this was justifiable action on Blogger's part, for the following reasons:

    1) Nobody is earning any profit off of what I put up - this site doesn't have any ads.

    2) The DMCA doesn't apply to me because I'm not American.

    I could be wrong on both counts, though. It's not worth the effort to fight it, so I'll just say that unless you were one of the few who saw the post before it was taken down, you missed some good fun.

    --Ryan

    Saturday, December 20, 2008

    Words fail me (continued)

    Back in October, I bemoaned the decline in quality of the Dictionary.com Word Of The Day. I complained that the words had gotten too simple, and if I wanted to learn something from this glorified spam, I wouldn't be able to.

    For a while, things were getting better. There were maybe two weeks of words starting with 'a', most of which I didn't recognize.

    But then came this week.

    Tuesday: fabricate.
    Wednesday: gaffe.
    Thursday: hackneyed.
    Friday: iambic.
    Saturday: jaded.

    Okay.

    Iambic is fine, since I would suspect that quite a few people are not students of poetry - it's not particularly useful in any way, but at least it's a word some people won't know. Ditto for hackneyed, which is fun to say.

    But gaffe? Fabricrate? Jaded

    Did I accidentily switch to the Word Of The Day For Twelve-Year-Olds?

    --Ryan

    (P.S. I was originally going to post something relatively cool - at least I think so - yesterday. But then stuff happened and I didn't have the time. And today I'm too tired to go through the little bit of grunt work that needs to be done; the moral of the story being that decisions made at 3 AM are rarely good ones. But tomorrow or Monday, I guarantee, it will be up. And I have now hyped it too much.)

    Cookie Puns

    For Christmas, we baked cookies for our families. Before I post pictures of how we arranged them, I need some help; I don't know what to write on the card!

    I'm thinking something really crumby. I mean downright tasteless. Yes, cookie puns. Any and all help is appreciated, 'cause so far my dad's getting something from his chocolate chip off the old block.

    --
    D. Phillips

    Wednesday, December 17, 2008

    The greatest

    The greatest sentence I have ever read on Wikipedia:

    The last renovation occurred in early 2006 when several scenes in the chocolate tour ride were replaced with singing, animatronic cows.


    I can only imagine how much better that line is devoid of all context.

    Also, the greatest reason I have ever heard for why Michael Igantieff is the new leader of the Liberals: Bob Rae was too busy reading ninety-five books.

    --Ryan

    Monday, December 15, 2008

    Don't be evil

    ...is, of course, Google's motto (a nice stark contrast to Microsoft's "Include just enough bugs in everything that they'll be sure to buy next year's version").

    But over the past couple weeks, I've had a couple of Google-related incidents which were perhaps not evil per se, but certainly worrying.

    First off, GMail. As far back as I can remember, my GMail account has had a VERY healthy and thriving spam folder (often between 150-200 messages). Currently, that number sits at...seven.

    Now, I'm not complaining about the lack of spam. Rather, I'm starting to wonder if GMail has been reprogrammed to block some spam from reaching my account at all. And although I've never had a real message accidentally sent to spam, I still like the idea of being able to see everything, just in case.

    Secondly, I've been using Google Toolbar for a few years now, and one of my favourite features of it is the pop-up blocker. Right now, the toolbar is telling me that it has blocked 615 pop-ups since it was installed (I suspect the real number is much higher).

    Yet lately, it's been behaving much more aggressively - among the things it's blocked have been the Blogger "upload picture" window, links I've right click+"open in new window"ed, and links I've clicked on in GMail messages!

    It's one thing to have an effective pop-up blocker, it's quite another for it to suddenly stop recognizing situations where I probably do want the pop-up.

    So like I said, Google's not exactly being evil...but they're a little closer to that line than they were a month ago.

    --Ryan

    Saturday, December 13, 2008

    Review: New Pornographers NPR Live Show


    (This post contains lots of links to Youtube videos. They are purely for my own enjoyment - and yours, if you wish - and not clips from the concert in question.)

    It should come as little surprise to anyone who regularly reads this blog that the New Pornographers are one of my favourite bands ever. So when I come across anything of theirs, I'm going to listen to it. It's in this spirit that I ended up downloading a concert the group did for NPR radio in the US back in March 2006.

    Now, one of the things that makes the New Pornographers so good in my books is that they have four different lead singers, with four noticeably different voices. Two guys (Dan Bejar and Carl Newman) and two girls (Neko Case and Kathryn Carter). This helps keep the songs diverse - much like The Beatles (or, um, Linkin Park? Faith No More? Help me out here!), different singers make for different-sounding songs.

    Neko and Dan don't always tour with the rest of the group - but they soldier on, as they did on the tour from which this show was recorded, with Carl, Kathryn, Kurt Dahle (drums) and Blaine Thurier (keyboards) pitching in with backing vocals, and guitarist Todd Fancey never setting foot anywhere near a microphone.

    Unfortunately, the day of this performance, Kathryn came down with laryngitis. This left the group without any female vocals whatsoever, and set the stage for what might be the oddest concert they've ever given.

    Worse yet, this was 2006 - their latest CD, Challengers, had yet to be released, so the group only had 75% of their current catalogue to choose from (although to be fair, I'm not sure what they could have really used from that without girls...maybe Mutiny, I Promise You or All The Things That Go To Make Heaven And Earth).

    So what did they play? Well, there were standard Carl-fronted songs that don't really sound that different without women, such as Twin Cinema and From Blown Speakers. There were Carl-fronted songs that are played at almost every concert but do sound slightly off without girls, including Slow Descent Into Alcoholism and Use It. There was a quartet of Carl songs that rarely (or never) get played in concert, comprised of July Jones, The End of Medicine, The Body Says No, and Breakin' The Law. There were the two most well-known and well-loved songs the New Pornographers have, where Carl was forced to sing parts meant for girls so fans would get their favourites (Sing Me Spanish Techno and a rendition of The Bleeding Heart Show that wasn't nearly as bad as one might have expected). There was one song I'd never heard before and thus can't comment on (Graceland), there was Carl singing a Den Bejar Song (Testament To Youth In Verse), and finally we got Todd, the guy who I didn't think ever sang, singing a Dan Bejar song (Jackie).

    And how was it? All things considered, pretty good. If you knew nothing of the New Pornographers other than their name, you might wonder why they deserved any sort of reputation after hearing this as a first exposure. It wasn't horrible, but it was somewhat below average (for music, not for the New Pornographers). If you're already a fan of the band, it's neat to hear what they sound like under unusual circumstances, but you'll be quick to admit that they're not at their best. Doesn't stop them from trying (and the between-song banter is good too!).

    I give it a C+...probably a D if this was what they sounded like normally, but it's graded much easier because of the situation they were in.

    --Ryan

    Happy Holidays!

    This is my attempt to get into the holiday spirit. My recent hobby of reading every word of the Geekologie archives has bestowed upon me this video.

    I'm sure SCRUBS spoofed A Charlie Brown Christmas, but I still really appreciate the person who strung them together.

    I apologize if this is too awesome for you to handle... or too offensive for you to handle... but if it was good enough to air on NBC, then it's good enough to air on honeygarlic.blogspot.com!



    --
    D. Phillips

    Thursday, December 11, 2008

    ... and I'm a PC

    Microsoft released its first clothing line called Software. (Heh. I get it.) The retro-style clothes include the DOS tangle and a picture of Bill Gate's mugshot.

    And now, I know that these are probably the most blogged about videos these days, but I can't help it. Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present to you: Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld!








    --
    D. Phillips

    (And now, for my attempt at Ryan's Jeopardy-style Labels.)

    Wednesday, December 10, 2008

    Twelve quick hits

    (There are a bunch of small things I want to mention, but I have no idea if I'll be able to make twelve. Let's see.)

    1) I don't know if anybody actually looks at the "blogs we know" list to the right (I do want to expand it eventually, turning it into "blogs we like"), but Cassan has been writing a lot this week. If you like reading stuff that's a lot of questions with very few answers (from a philosophical point of view), check it out.

    2) This morning was my first exam. I can now safely forget the four types of prison movies, and whatever else I learned. Actually, I didn't do nearly as poorly as I was expecting, considering I've been sick and unable to focus on studying from more than maybe 15 minutes at a time. And there was a lump under my pillow last night (very few people will have any idea what I'm talking about there, but they'll all be at least chuckling).

    3) Speaking of being sick, I don't think DayQuil exists anymore. This doesn't make me happy - DayQuil and NyQuil were a perfect combination for me to get over any sickness (not necessarily for everyone though, from my experiences different people tend to react differently to different medications). I went to Shoppers yesterday to buy some, and there wasn't even a spot for it.

    4) On a related note, NyQuil is now green. On the list of "Things Ryan Has Ingested That Were Purposely But Freakishly Green", NyQuil fits somewhere between ketchup and eggs.

    FIVE GOLDEN RINGS...fourcallingbirdsthreefrenchhenstwoturtledovesandapartridgeinapeartree.

    6) Canadians love it when Americans talk about us, right? Well here's Jon Stewart and friends on our Parliamentary crisis. I have to say, I love the way the rest of the world is treating this as "Harper clinging to power" and nothing more.

    7) What's the deal with bedframes? As much as that sounds like the setup to a joke, it's a serious question, and something I was pondering in my NyQuil-induced not-quite-asleep state last night. What purpose do bedframes serve? Is it just that people like having the extra leverage when they slide out of bed in the morning?

    8) As a follow up from #1 and #7, it's good to question things. Even things that seem like they needn't be questioned. I learned recently that when Pierre Trudeau became Prime Minister, one of the first things he did was ask the Foreign Affairs department why Canada needed a Foreign Affairs department (presumably he did this to every department). It seems like a simple question, but what's the point of doing or using something unless you understand why it's there?

    9) The Kitchener Rangers haven't been winning too many games lately. Not a big deal. As I believe I said at the start of the season, the bulk of the team is 17- and 18-year-olds - people who will be back, and better, next year.

    10) While I've been sick, I've been listening to the radio a lot (the idea being that with my iPod, I might start skipping through songs, which might prevent me from falling asleep) - and I've come to realize something. I have a very hard time telling the difference between Hedley and Theory Of A Deadman and Faber Drive and Daughtry, etc. I know there's a lot of good new music out there, but it's up to people to discover it for themselves because almost all radio stations will only play what appeals to everybody a little bit, rather than what appeals to some people a lot. I think there's an untapped market here.

    11) I want to go on a vacation next fall where I ride scooters. I really don't understand why Blogger would pick those as the three sample labels. (Yes, I'm reaching to make twelve.)

    12) Jay Leno is getting a primetime talk show. I like this a lot. I don't know if I'll watch it, but primetime television becoming something more than episodic series, a show where you can watch it whenever you want and still be entertained, sounds like a great idea to me. Now if only he can get guests that are on to be entertaining, rather than to plug their latest book or movie.

    --Ryan

    Monday, December 8, 2008

    I lied

    ...when I said I was done with politics for the time being.

    But when I said that, I didn't expect this to show up on Youtube.



    (Particularly the part from 3:20 on.)

    --Ryan

    Sunday, December 7, 2008

    Pinky and the Brain (and Larry)

    In the mid-1990s, there was no greater cartoon than Animaniacs - a collection of short cartoons featuring a wide array of characters, and jokes that worked on two levels (so that adults could understand some things that went over kids' heads).

    One of the most memorable Animaniacs series was Pinky and the Brain. Why, I bet just the mere mention of those two mice has got the theme song going in your head, hasn't it?

    Well, at one point, Warner Brothers executives believed that Pinky and the Brain had grown stale, and needed a third character.

    The writers' response was a tad unpredictable - write an episode with a third character (never intended to be permanent), and use the episode as a meta-criticism of adding any third character.

    The entire cartoon is here:


    Okay, so you probably didn't have to watch the whole thing, the theme song was the best part. And no, that plot (aside from the new character) wasn't particularly unusual for the show.

    In the end, it was all for naught, as anybody who can remember the horrible season of "Pinky, Elmyra and the Brain" can attest.

    --Ryan

    Friday, December 5, 2008

    And now for something completely different

    Bomb scares are no laughing matter.

    Even in an unlikely setting (like downtown Kitchener).

    Especially when there really is a bomb.

    Except for when it turns out to be completely harmless, and wholly accidental, as was the case earlier this week.

    A World War II era bomb - helpfully labeled 'bomb' - was found behind a wall in the basement of a Kitchener house by some electricians. This led to the entire block being evacuated and the Army called in to dispose of the bomb.

    Had the bomb detonated, it would have just produced a lot of smoke - it was a practice bomb, so to speak. It belonged to a former owner of that house, who picked it up as a souvenir from an armoury and then forgot he ever had it.

    My favourite part is still him feeling the need to label it.

    -----------------------

    One last thought on politics (at least until the situation changes).

    In fact, we'll do it as a game. Spot the flaw in the following sentence, only very slightly paraphrased from John Baird:

    "The opposition has hatched an unconstitutional plot for no reason other than to gain power, and we are prepared to go over the Governor-General's head to prevent it."

    --Ryan

    Tuesday, December 2, 2008

    Flanagan ON politics


    It's almost impossible to understand everything that's going on in Ottawa this week (although I'd like to give the Macleans.ca bloggers a round of applause for the best coverage I've been able to find), but one thing is clear - everybody involved is, to some degree, at fault.

    The Conservatives are the easiest to pin blame on - promising a Parliament of bipartisan cooperation was a good move. The fiscal update tabled last week wasn't necessarily a horrible idea either - if you're not going to make any meaningful gestures towards fixing the economy, symbolic gestures likes the ones contained therein are appreciated. That said, if those are your primary objectives - working with other parties and making symbolic gestures that don't have any real meaning - one of those gestures being an attempt to bankrupt every other political party shows a stunning lack of common sense.

    If that were the end of it, fine - the Conservatives made their bed, and now they have to lie in it, but at least they're not as bad as the opposition parties (I'm now convinced that the Conservatives could not introduce a single piece of legislation which a single other party would support, no matter how well it fit with their ideology).

    But that's not the end of it. Instead, the Conservatives are caught completely off guard by the opposition realizing that the pledge of bipartisanship was completely bogus, and now claiming that the coalition is somehow 'undemocratic', 'un-Canadian', or 'a coup d'etat' (all terms used by Conservatives in the past 24 hours).

    It's not. No matter how many times this Conservative-created talking point is espoused on your local talk radio station (our governing party has spent at least part of their week publishing a list of Conservative-friendly radio hosts and talking points people can use when calling in), there's no reason to believe it. Think back to the last election you voted in - did you vote for the Prime Minister? Unless you were in his riding, no, you didn't.

    You voted for your MP. You voted for somebody to represent you in Parliament - and it's up to those people to organize themselves in such a manner that the Prime Minister is able to make legislation that is supported by more than half the House of Commons. Stephen Harper is no longer able to do that, Stephane Dion is (and as a bonus, his ability to do so is in writing).

    "Oh," the Conservative supporters will whine, "nobody votes for their MP anymore, they vote for the party." Not true. People might vote for the MP because of his party, but they're voting directly for the MP. In fact, if people do vote because of party allegiance, I can think of worse affronts to democracy in recent memory.

    What other Conservative talking points can I dispel? Not too many as it turns out, they're almost all along the lines of "people didn't vote for anything other than the Conservatives". However, here's what I did dig up...

    I mean, I follow the news, virtually every single day you have Harper or Flaherty out there telegraphing exactly what they plan to do with the economy.


    And completely contradicting each other in the process. Harper told the APEC summit in Peru that Canada would run a deficit. Jim Flaherty has repeatedly claimed that he will never put Canada into deficit, even if it means selling off assets at low costs to make sure the books stay balanced. (Actually, I guess Harper would be in favour of that plan - undervalued assets? Sounds like some good buying opportunities!) That worked out really well when he tried it in Ontario, didn't it? Highway 407 is making truckloads of money for a foreign corporation, and Flaherty secretly left Ontario $5 billion in debt anyhow!

    Oh, by the way, you don't need to mention that you follow the news - if you really do, it'll show in the rest of what you say.

    And I wish the media would be more clear on this point – the opposition aren’t being singled out by this fact the Conservatives stand to lose the most money of all. The only difference is that Canadians are voluntarily giving money the Conservatives, so they don’t need taxpayer handouts. The only reason the opposition would be hurt more is because nobody wants to donate to them. They should be putting their efforts towards fixing that problem.


    Ooh, I like this one. Where to start?

    Okay, let's see. The reason the Conservatives get so much money from other donors is because they govern for the rich. The NDP, because of their ideology, will never attract large support from the upper class - so unless you're suggesting that the most important function of a political party is to make money, rather than, oh, I don't know, maybe to help people, those subsidies are the most democratic means of party finance there are.

    As for the part about the Conservatives losing the most money of all? Absolutely. But look at the Green Party or Christian Heritage Party or Natural Law Party or whoever you want - they're not getting money any other way, and without that money, they can't have their voices heard. And I'm sure most Conservatives don't mind losing a few million dollars in party money, since they're still getting Cabinet positions (and Cabinet salaries) in record numbers.

    I don’t want another election. But what I want even less is a surprise backroom Prime Minister whom I never even had the opportunity to vote for or against. What an insult to democracy.


    Not so fast there, Connie. Okay, I'm cheating a bit on this one - I wanted to mention the "plotting with socialists and separatists" line the Conservatives have been so fond of this week. Boy, that sounds familiar. Of course, it's only an insult to democracy when you're on the receiving end, isn't it?

    ------------------

    I'm not saying the coalition is completely in the right. As I mentioned earlier, they're in the position there where they've hyped up this coalition idea so much, Harper could offer a carbon tax, doubling the corporate tax, and Quebec being legally allowed to separate on the whims of its Premier, and Dion, Layton, and Duceppe (in that order) still wouldn't jump ship.

    In a minority parliament, such as we have, it's the job of all parties to make the government work. The Conservatives weren't willing to do that - but now, they might be (although I haven't seen them make any serious attempt at reconciliation), and the other parties have forgotten that they can't shut the Conservatives out until Michelle Jean grants their request to let them form government themselves.

    (I do think she'll grant it. The job of a Governor-General is to ensure that there is always a government running Canada, with the ability to get its agenda through the House of Commons. The Conservatives no longer have that ability, the opposition does - and we don't need an election to prove it.)

    --Ryan

    P.S.: Longest post ever?