Paper wars

(I really need to start writing more. I keep coming up with new ideas, I think I've got a backlog of about twenty by now.)

Backstory: I sometimes start work before I would normally be awake. On these days, I need an alarm clock to help me wake up. I like to set the alarm clock to thelocal all-news radio station, so I can go into worked well-versed in...erm, rarely anything the least bit interesting.

This is particularly bad on Sundays, and especially when it comes to the business report - all the stock markets close on weekends, no major CEOs will be announcing anything, it's hard to come up with business news twice an hour.

So this past Sunday, at 7:26 AM, Mike Eppel was talking about toilet paper.

In 1997, Kimberley-Clark (makers of Kleenex, Huggies, and other paper products) merged the Scott Paper Company. However, the Canadian Competition Bureau ruled that the transaction would create a company too powerful, and forced Scott Paper Limited to remain the Canadian producers of Scott products. (In 2006, Scott Paper Limited changed its name to Kruger Products, which is what it will be referred to as for the rest of this post.)

Kruger was given the rights to use the original Scott names for only ten years - so, in 2004 (ahead of schedule), Cottonelle became Cashmere and ScottTowels became SpongeTowels.

Now, Kimberley-Clark has control over the original names once again, and is releasing new products in Canada under those names. (Apparently Wal-Mart is one of the stores selling them.)

So if you're at the store, and see Cottonelle toilet paper - it's not what you think it is.

--Ryan

Alternate title for this post: Cottonelle, Cottonelle, calling Cottonelle, Cottonelle, Cottonelle, Batman.